The 17 Rules of Eating by Ron Swanson That We Live to Follow

[dropcap]W[/dropcap]e all know Ron Swanson as the guy with the exquisite mustache from Parks and Recreation, who says exactly what we are thinking. Since he is the master of eating and survival in general, it is time for everyone to get on board with his rules of nourishment.

Here are the 17 rules of food consumption created by our favorite bacon-lover that we live to follow, because these are what your New Year's resolutions should really be.

1. Ron Swanson is better at eating than any of us.

Like actually

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Feb 19, 2015 at 7:48am PST

2. Always be prepared to BBQ.

?

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Apr 12, 2015 at 1:15pm PDT

3. Just always be prepared.

The fact that there is no bacon emoji is a travesty.

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Feb 11, 2015 at 12:20pm PST

4. If you are try to be "healthy" while trying to be a dessert, you are doing it wrong.

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Mar 25, 2016 at 1:21pm PDT

5. I'll take a Lagavulin 16 neat with a side of bacon, or nothing at all.

Happy ode to alcoholism day

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Mar 17, 2016 at 2:39pm PDT

6. A free breakfast buffet is a reason to go anywhere.

Priorities

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Feb 21, 2016 at 8:58am PST

7. If you enjoy your appendages, never grab food off of other people's plates, especially if it's shrimp.

Follow the @sapersteintwins

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Feb 11, 2016 at 3:16pm PST

8. Hazelnut is the death flavor; your coffee doesn't need it.

Summer is ending ?

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Aug 29, 2014 at 7:19am PDT

9. A bottle a day keeps the doctor away.

#stayhealthyfriends

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Dec 16, 2015 at 12:41pm PST

10. Shrimp is the only thing that makes bacon better.

#ronswanson #parksandrecreation #parksandrec

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Jun 23, 2014 at 6:36pm PDT

11. Because Chicago-style deep dish pizza is food and that other stuff is basically cardboard.

Offerman's stance on #pizza ?

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Jul 14, 2014 at 1:34pm PDT

12. Ribs first, meetings later.

Sorry for not posting in a while ~ this should lift your spirits ?

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Jul 11, 2014 at 10:38am PDT

13. If you want to grow up big and strong, chew on some pork.

Never trust a vegan

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Sep 5, 2015 at 10:29am PDT

14. Don't be a liar and don't be skim milk either.

#milk #skimmilk #food #lying #water #ron #ronswanson #tagsforlikes #mustache #saturday #weekend #funny #funnyquote #quote #lol #cold #spring #warm #tbt #awesome #parksandrec #parksandrecreation #nbc #tv

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Mar 29, 2014 at 5:33am PDT

15. Leave the salad for the silly rabbits.

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Jun 6, 2015 at 11:18am PDT

16. We are at the top of the food chain for a reason.

#ronswanson #swanson #ron #parksandrec #parksandrecreation

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on May 15, 2014 at 7:55pm PDT

17. And last, but not least, breakfast food reigns supreme...

???

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on May 7, 2015 at 9:09am PDT

because bacon and eggs will cure whatever ails ya.

Eat some breakfast ?

A post shared by Ron Swanson (@ronnswanson) on Feb 25, 2015 at 5:56am PST