Gordon Ramsay is known for being a couple of different adjectives. To the public, “understanding,” “kind,” and “helpful” may not be the first descriptors they think of when they hear this celebrity chef’s name. The following video though, requires that Ramsay be all of these things and more.
Why, you ask? He has to give a totally random, untrained guy named Shane cooking directions from start to finish.
Oh, and Shane and Ramsay are back-to-back.
It's Gordon Ramsay versus a totally random guy named Shane. Good luck, Shane.
Posted by Bon Appétit Magazine on Wednesday, February 22, 2017
The menu item is a crab cake. Seems simple enough, right? Wrong. Ramsay starts by asking Shane, “On a scale of ten, how bad are you?”
“Uh, pretty bad. I’d say a two,” Shane replies. The setup seems perfect, and to increase the chaos there’s a timer set to fifteen minutes.
The first step Ramsay instructs Shane to carry out is to put the crab flat-part down. To Ramsay, this means top-down. Shane, however, keeps his crab top-up. The result? Shane pulls his crab’s legs off, while Ramsay pulls the top portion away from the rest of the crab. Woops.
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Ramsay then instructs Shane on how to “beautifully slide out [an] incredible nugget of crab” from a claw. Shockingly, Shane is unable to proffer a beautiful nugget of tasty crab meat. Instead, he continuously pinches himself with the claws. It’s incredible.
While cutting bell peppers, Ramsay says to cut them into pieces sized to one-half centimeter. Shane, like any true American, admits that he doesn’t do metric. We’re right there with you, bud. Shane’s bell peppers are, you guessed it, not quite as finely diced as Ramsay’s.
“Keep up with me, please,” says Ramsay.
“I’m doing my best,” Shane replies. Something as genuinely comedic as this couldn’t be scripted. Watching Shane try (and fail) to keep up is just too good.
Egg, mustard, Worcestershire sauce, and cayenne pepper are added to the crab cake mixture in hilarious fashion. After the crab cakes are formed and slated to be put into a pan with olive oil, Ramsay notes that the great thing about them is that since the peppers are so finely diced, you won’t even know they’re there.
Shane’s peppers are large green and yellow chunks, jettisoning themselves from the crab cake “patty” he’s made. Again, you can’t make this stuff up.
They create a dressing with mayo, capers, mustard, and chopped red onion. Shane has no chopped red onion, so Ramsay offers him some of his. Don’t worry, though; the integrity of the back-to-back setting is not compromised.
The final, plated dishes are remarkably different. Ramsay’s looks as you’d expect. Shane’s looks, well, just as you’d expect it to look. When Ramsay sees what Shane has made, he lets out a wonderfully bright expletive.
The video ends with a perfect comment from Ramsay. We’ll leave you with it. “Shane, did you drop it?”